It is not my custom to focus as intently as I have on the passage of time these past forty days, and yet my experience has become that of a smoke-filled bubble; where previously I would have been content to merely observe events unfold and meditate on them, I now find the bubble has burst and my energies have begun to diffuse into a collective environment of toil and mutual duty. Spending what time I have in the company of my new comrades has reignited the fire kindled when last I walked among the Mallorn trees of my birthplace, fed a desire to become like the great warriors of whom I used to sing and tell tales. Yet where once I would have taken simple pleasure in the construction of a song or melody or the clever use of language in the tales, now I feel drawn to their meanings like a flower reaching towards the sun.
Even as I feel as I do and proclaim the glory of sacred purpose, it rings hollow. When last I confided in Aearandir about my concerns... no, fears, of the coming battle, he attempted to allay them with wisdom and temperance, which I must thank him formally for, but the sour taste in my mouth remained in spite of his counsel. I had been going about my independent training exercises when I came upon the Lady Isilmewen several days past, she had been present when I initially voiced my worries to hirgonui and seemed to see into my heart even before I greeted her. A sort of matronly demeanor took her which made her appear quite lovely, she laid a hand on my arm and gazed into each of my eyes in turn. I admit, I was uncomfortable for the attention, but felt the youngling again being shown how a broken toy might be repaired. I felt at peace in her company, thankful for some unspoken dialogue. As though my mind were written for her to read, the lady spoke to me of a task she required assistance with: while the trained members of the herth had aided the Dunedain against encroaching Wargs, it had been a bloody fight and many of the rangers required urgent care from a skilled healer. She would need escorts while tending to her new charges and asked my if I would like to join her. This was not a request I could answer directly in good faith.
I sought out Aearandir and discovered him tending to his equipment beneath one of the willows that embrace the sanctuary. I might mention that when he was instructing me on healing procedures at my final directed training session, hirgonui seemed to lose himself in thought, if only for a moment, while discussing the fashioning of litters for fallen comrades. I have been meaning to ask him about this, but I do not feel it would be appropriate at current. I must make a point to do so in the future. But I digress, I told him my story and to both my shame and relief, he granted me permission to accompany the Lady Isilmewen on her task. I am now, however, to double my training regiment and take both dusk and dawn patrols of Lin Giliath. Though I have doubled my efforts training, I feel that patrols will soon be a thing of the past; the herth departed not a day past for Nan Wathren. The lady intends to travel to Esteldín shortly, after all necessary supplies have been gathered, and I am not certain how I will redeem myself in the eyes of my comrades... and Aearandir.
Faelach, who will be the senior warden escort and my partner, is calling me, I will write on the progress of the lady's mission as time passes.
