The last day´s have been really busy and full of both tears and feelings. I have found time now to wright this text between my tears. This day´s have been my worst in along time.
When I think about it I am lucky to have my new friends by my side. I have not been this happy as I am at the moment but at the same time I feel so sad. Without them I would not doing the things I do to day.
Rhia have change my life a lot seems I left my farm to find some friends in Bree. The only thing is that I always feel that I want to do more for her. She have a lot to do and really much on her mind. Even then she say I do a lot for her I can´t helping feeling helpless. I have promised my self to do everything I can to help her and stay by her side.
Qswas, my love. I feel a warm feeling every time I think about him. He is a very busy man, I not see him as much as I want to be honest. But by his side I feel safe. Like that time Zandy should take a look at my back after a hit I got from a trip to the Barrows. I had not think it was that serious but had some pain and wanted someone to look at it. When she sad it needed to stitches I got so scared. When I lie down at the bed and she started to clean the wound I felt a terrible pain. I tired not to scream but the pain was to painfully. I don´t remember more of what happed after that, I just remember hearing Qswas voice and feel that he was by my side. People how was there have told me after this that he stayed by my side all the time, it most have been awful. Now have my back healed good and my back is like it was before.
Few day´s ago I was told by Rhia that Qswas was planing to go back to Gondor to fight in the war. I was so scared when I hear those word´s. After all the story´s he told me about he´s fight´s. I felt that I understand why he want to go, he want to protect he´s family in Gondor. But I am so afraid that I going to lose him. The man I just married. The man I love with all my heart. My tears at falling as I writes this. I was so angry at him for not telling me about he´s plans. It all end up in a fight between us two. I was crying all night after he left. After I have been thinking I will let him go if he feel he need to, I will be here waiting for him. If he decides to go I will stay by he´s side.
Now I need to go to rest it have been some long day´s and not to much sleep at all.
